Um, so you know what I was saying just yesterday about never trying my hand at poetry after being told my Frommage poem wasn't good enough for my high school literary magazine? I guess I kind of lied. There's no hiding it now, though, because...as of today...I'm a published poet!
It's true. Uh huh. I'm one of this week's winners of the "Why I Love Peet's" story contest. And the prize? My "poetry" published on the beyond-awesome-coffee-maker's website, plus two pounds of free beans a month for the next year...for me and five of my closest friends! (An approximate value of $2300! What the...?!). Sadly, I can't include you on that list of friends (though I so totally would if I hadn't already specified who they'd be when I entered...and if I weren't limited to five friends. How can you limit me that way? Again, I must ask: Don't you know who I am?!).
Then again...there's certainly nothing preventing you from winning too. After all, I don't get the impression the fine people at Peet's are terribly discriminating in their literary judgments. I mean, um, their standards are seriously low! (Not that you're not an awesome writer! No, really...you rock.) I'm just saying that after I submitted my winning entry, I discovered one of my two "haikus" didn't even contain the correct number of syllables (I'm sure I typed it in there correctly, but...um...computer glitch much?)...and yet I still won! How you like me now, Mrs. Herring? See how persistence pays off? See how bad poetry can be worth something...to someone...somewhere?
Okay, so I know you want to read my alleged haikus...right? Right? Well just click here and then scroll past all those long-winded entries (including a SONNET. A sonnet? Why waste time writing a full-on sonnet when you can skate by with a haiku, I ask!). Eventually, you'll come to the short, perky WINNER #6 (or just look down at the bottom of this post). Yes, that's right. I'm a WINNER. (And short and perky? Who knew?!)
Talk about a caffeine-induced buzz to end all buzzes. WOO HOO! My cup so runneth over.
AND THE WINNER IS...ME (along with, like, 59 other people...or so)!
Winner #6: Alexa Young
PEET'S FOR LIFE!
Two Coffee Haikus by Alexa Young
Where DID you get this coffee?
Should have gone to Peet's
What is this blend called again?*
*Note: Apparently I left out the word "again" in my original entry (or at least somebody did. Damn those Peet's editors!).